After months of sweet invites, a few huffy exits, and reluctantly resorting to begging, pleading, and voodoo, it’s clear he will not do yoga with you in public in this lifetime. Instead of harassing him and creating more tension, bring yoga to him. With the following simple, at-home partnered poses, you don’t even have to call it yoga. Just ask him if you can help stretch out his “guns.” He’ll be hard-pressed to refuse.

As you become physically closer, you will deepen your emotional closeness as well, says Charles Matkin, senior yoga teacher at Yoga Works in New York City.

Here are great stretches with an intimacy-building benefit. Do them in a series or choose the one that is most appealing. Whether or not your at-home sessions are steamy or stretchy is up to you.


Child’s Pose
Benefit: Builds connection and calm

(For this pose, one partner will be on top and the other at the base. Here, we designated the man as the base and the woman on top, but it certainly can be reversed.)

The man sits in Child’s Pose, making sure his thighs are far apart enough to rest his hips on his inner thighs while sitting on his heels. If his hips don’t touch his heels, use a rolled-up blanket, towel, or other prop for support. The woman on top brings her sacrum to meet his, so she sits facing the opposite direction as the man. Then, she begins to lay back on his spine in a backbend. Again, if his head can’t reach the ground, use a pillow beneath his forehead. The woman will feel her spine free in a backbend, while the man will feel his hips gently stretching in Child’s pose. “For both people to get the benefits, both have to be comfortable. If you’re faking comfortability for your partner, neither of you will have a good experience,” Matkin says. The person on the bottom can usually hold the pose longest, so the top person should say “when.”


Partner Awkward Chair
Benefit: Builds trust, strengthens thighs

Stand facing one another. Hold hands so you are two arms’ lengths apart. Start bending your knees and lowering your body while keeping your spine straight like you are sitting in an invisible chair. You’ll feel yourself strengthening in your thighs. Gaze into each others’ eyes—this will either crack you up or intensify the connection. If one partner starts to work too hard, he or she will start to fall toward the other person. “Both partners will have to learn to let go,” Matkin says. Make it fun; if one person starts to stiffen up, “put a little salsa in your hips” by wiggling them around, Matkin says. Hold the pose for four breaths longer than you’d like.


Sun Salutes
Benefit: Builds balance and ab strength

Do a Sun Salutation facing one another. This will help you both increase your flexibility and blood flow. When you get to the lunge, place your hands palm-to-palm, pushing from your back leg, hips, and spine into your partner’s palms. Then, interlace your fingers and pull away from each other using strength from your front leg. Keep your shoulders and hips from shifting backward, and ground your off-balance body with your core. Look into each other’s eyes. “It’s a great metaphor for focus, balance, and being centered,” Matkin says. Don’t let your mind wander or you’ll fall. Hold for 15 breaths or as long as you both are smiling. If someone starts to frown, stop.


Breathing Side by Side
Benefit: Builds awareness and lung capacity

Laying side by side, head to toe so one person’s head faces the other’s shins, make sure you are close enough to put your hands on each other’s bellies. See if you can synchronize your breathing. It will be hard to tell who is leading, like when you’re dancing, because your inner rhythms will fall into sync. “It releases the diaphragm, freeing up the spine so you become much longer and taller while mentally unwinding,” Matkin says.